Mashed Faux-tatoes

"Now you're looking for the secret. But you won't find it because of course, you're not really looking. You don't really want to work it out. You want to be fooled."
-- Cutter, The Prestige

The arrival of 2011 brought about the change in my diet.  Lisa and I decided that if we were going to do one of the thousands of diets out there today, that the low-carb diet seemed the easiest to accommodate our lifestyle.

Everything was going well until I decided to to cook up some steaks and both of us really wanted mashed potatoes.  For those unfamiliar with a low-carb diet, potatoes of any kind are strictly prohibited due their massive amounts of carbohydrates.  One small russet potato, weighing approximately 6 ounces, has 31g of carbs, 2g of dietary fiber and has 134 calories. We're not suppose to consume more than 20 net carbs in a single day (at least right now).

NET CARB = CARBOHYDRATES (minus) DIETARY FIBER

Needless to say, potatoes are off the menu for a while. Thankfully, necessity is the mother of invention (a favorite quote of Lisa, when she sees a newly created contraption, gadget, or recipe for that matter), and we discovered mashed cauliflower.

Cauliflower, on the other hand, with a serving weighing in at approximately 7 ounces, has only 10g of carbs, 6 grams of dietary fiber and has only 50 calories. That's a net carb difference of 25 points between those two produce items!

Luckily, I've discovered a fantastic recipe that will reduce your carb intake while satisfying your desire for mashed potatoes. I can't promise you that they'll taste identical, cause they won't. There is an obvious difference in flavor between a potato and a cauliflower.

However, when they're manipulated with cream and Parmesan cheese, the combination creates a fantastic dish that yields 8-10 servings, which can last up to a week in the fridge (and even longer in the freezer), with a flavor-profile reputation in the same category as lasagna, where it tastes even better the second day.

MASHED FAUX-TATOES (Mashed Cauliflower)

Ingredients Needed:

• 1 Head of Cauliflower, cut in pieces (remove the cabbage-like leaves)
• 1/2 cup heavy cream
• 1/2 cup grated Parmesan cheese (not the Kraft stuff)
• 1/2 tsp garlic powder (optional)
• 96 oz chicken broth or stock (can be made with bullion or base)
• Salt & Pepper to taste

Cooking Directions:

1. Fill 3.5 Qt. Pot with cauliflower and chicken stock; bring to a boil and cook till cauliflower is tender, approximately 15-20 minutes.
2. Drain liquid; add cream, Parmesan cheese, garlic power, salt & pepper
3. Mash cauliflower to break down all large pieces
4. Complete mashing process with immersion blender until texture is very smooth, 2-3 minutes.  (You can use a blender or food processor if you don't have an immersion blender, but I try to use the least amount of equipment to simplify clean-up.)

The measurements are an approximation. Depending on thickness and consistency (or if you were able to drain all of the chicken broth/stock), you may want to add only part of the cream at first.  Don't skimp on the Parmesan cheese, however.  In fact, I probably added more before the completion of the dish.

Salt & Pepper are a must in order for the dish to taste right.  If you don't, it'll seem like something is still missing.  Some have added butter, which isn't necessary, but if you do, go easy on the salt.

I hope you all find this recipe delicious, and a new and enjoyable way to eat your vegetables.

Stay hungry... and may the fork be with you.